By Intake and Resident Specialist Holly Gardner
Recently I screened a family into our program. Ms. M. is a single mom with twin 15 year old teenagers, a boy and girl. She has a long list of issues that contributed to her homeless situation, but by far the most challenging was living with her ex who is a serious substance abuser. There were many low points as her relationship crumbled away, both financial and emotional. She stuck things out for as long as she could, but could no longer tolerate the impact these behaviors were having on her teens. Her daughter is a serious student and seemed to cope in healthier ways, but her son was more vulnerable. He ended up running with a bad crowd. He made some poor decisions that got him in to serious trouble.
Mom and the teens are more stable now. She managed to keep her job through her trials and tribulations. Her daughter continues to thrive at school and her son is hopefully learning some hard lessons. Happily, he is physically separated from people who were not such a good influence.
As this mom was moving in and getting settled, she shared with me she had 2 pups, family pets that also became homeless with her. She was lucky enough to have relatives and some friends she met through shelter who could provide them homes. However, her luck and time had run out for her pets. Soon after she moved in here, the lady keeping her pups told her she would have to make other arrangements or take them to an animal shelter. This is what she shared with me one evening this week that got us both tearing up. These pups have been through so much, and as hard as she tried she could not get her own place in time to keep them. She had to take time off work to get her pups to the animal shelter where she met a wonderful woman who stated she would work hard to find good homes for her beloved dogs. The dogs were very well behaved and had an excellent chance to have a new home and family. This was the very best she could do for them, as she scaled her life back more and more to accommodate her reality.
These are just some of the hardships this family has endured and example of tough choices that had to be made so that this single mom could navigate her new life. As she walked through the lobby and down the hall way to meet with her family coach, she smiled a big smile and said, "I know my pups are in a warm safe place for now, I don’t have to put anyone else out and someday I will have a home of my own again."
Yes, there are obvious issues our families have had to make - tough choices to help themselves move forward and meet their goals. Sometimes these choices impact their pets, which are most definitely members of their families. This is a reminder to me sometimes we have to let go to maintain and to grow.
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